The Greatest Show On Earth

If I were to join a freak show or circus (just go with me on this one), I already know exactly what talent I’d bring to the big top experience. Ok, I’m no lion tamer, I’d make a terrible bearded lady (unless the new definition of “bearded lady” is “faint, pubescent boy mustache”), and the trapeze is the absolute last place you’ll find me… (and no, blinding people with my paleness isn’t a talent… it’s a gift I give freely #yourewelcome). No, my special skill would be the magical elastic girl – twisting my body into shapes that apparently aren’t normal (if you only knew how many photos I haven’t used because I look like a broken doll human or fashionable demon in need of an exorcist…) and appearing taller than I actually am. Now, I’m not short, but there’s nothing like a nice vertical stripe to elongate the frame. It’s true! You know how some folks kvetch about how horizontal stripes make you look wider? Well, friend, if you take those horizontal stripes and flip ’em on their ear, you can visually tack on a vertical inch or two. Ok, fine, it’s not exactly a wild and crazy box office draw of a trick, but it’s still pretty cool, right?

Skirt: Victoria Beckham x Target

Crop top: Windsor (similar)

Heels: Target

Sunglasses: Charming Charlie

Gold spike bracelet: Audaviv (similar)

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