My wardrobe has two settings: bold, bright, and badass and fun, flouncy, and feminine. Usually I favor whimsy over womanly though, so anytime I find myself feeling unabashedly ladylike, I am reminded of a few #justgirlythings:
- Life expectancy for my manicure: 10 minutes. Life expectancy for my pedicure: 20 years.
- Any beauty guru knows that the best way to turn your pristine daytime makeup into a smudgy, smokey eye is to just wear your contact lenses too long.
- Sometimes I think about working out, but then I figure I hit my squat quota for the month anytime I have to use a child sized toilet in heels.
- Want to add shine to your hair? Wear lipgloss on a windy day!
- You know, Sherlock Holmes is touted as being this brilliant problem solving, master of disguise, but I’ve never once seen him remove blood from anything, covertly smuggle a tampon to the bathroom, OR even attempt contour his face. Methinks the bar for “genius” was set puh-retty low.
- Blowouts are like the rain dances of the modern age. Hair on fleek? It’s gonna sleet.
- I’ve never attempted a Houdini escape from a chained strait jacket while suspended over a pool of piranhas, but I have worn tights before, so… I figure I can handle it.
Other favorite #justgirlythings include: sarcasm, smashing the patriarchy, and these Kendra Scott earrings (did you know that you can get 50% off any one item at Kendra Scott during your birthday month? Treat. Yo. Self.)